well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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