can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Your cock deserves a montage
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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