It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
