He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
