I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
