there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
