Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
