question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
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