every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I licked your asshole in confidence.
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