DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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