But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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