Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
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