Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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