i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
