Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
