He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
