So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
