i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize