i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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