ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
