threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
