I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
