susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
