If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
