you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
