Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
