i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
