She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
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