i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
