this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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