her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
it's like iHOP with fire
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
