Porn is love you can see.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
