You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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