Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
