I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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