walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
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