Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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