3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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