I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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