i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
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