Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
you are never too drunk for berry picking
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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