Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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