I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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