Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
