she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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