Pappa wants mamma naked
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
