Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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