belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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