Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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