i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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