their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
So many bounce houses so little time
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
